Monday, August 11, 2014

Still Just Waiting

A couple of weeks ago we passed the 5 month waiting mark for our current/second adoption. I know that's not too far in and it's normal to wait 1-2 years to get matched, but with the buddy we were matched right at the 5 month mark, so it's a significant point in the timeline for me. 

Overall, we're doing really well and aren't too antsy. Yet. This time is a different kind of hard than it was last time. Last time we were waiting to become parents so the wait seemed eternal! (But of course it wasn't.) And this time our sweet buddy certainly keeps us busy. But, it also seems harder in some ways. The first time we waited we assumed it would be at least a year before we were chosen, so we weren't anxious for the phone to ring or for our social worker to email us with good news. But, this time we know what it's like to get "the call" when you've been chosen by a birthmother. So this time it seemed so likely it could happen sooner rather than later! But, it hasn't. And for various reasons, this time around we've also heard more about when our profile is being shown. We never really knew last time, so I couldn't stress about it. But, this time I DO stress about it! Every time we know a birthmother is looking at our profile, I feel glued to my computer to see if there are any email updates and I'm a lot more crushed this way since I get my hopes up that we could be bringing a baby home soon. It's kind of hard knowing that women look at us and our profile and decide they don't want us to raise their unborn baby. But, of course, we know that whoever she did pick for her precious child will be the right fit for them, and we are very happy for the couple that does get to bring home the new baby!

So, right now there really are no updates. We only waited for 5 months the first time and we will gladly wait much, much longer to have another child that is the right fit for our family. He fits in perfectly in our family, and we trust and pray that God will bring the child that is meant to be with us at the right time. But, there are tough days too. Days we worry about how the next child will fit into our family, how long we will have to wait, or what another open adoption might look like. The future is SO incredibly unknown! But, we are trying to wait patiently. It's not like we have a say in how quickly this time goes by, but we certainly have a choice in how we spend this time and we are choosing to having fun and enjoy our sweet boy every day. And don't worry. If we DO hear something, we'll be sure to keep you posted!

4 comments:

  1. It IS so hard to wait! We have been waiting 1 year + 3 months. The average wait with our agency is 2 years, so I know, in my head, we technically haven't waited long yet. But it's hard not knowing when the wait will end. I'm glad God knows what He's doing :) Here's to hoping you'll have your second baby in your arms soon!

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  2. Yay! I didn't know you guys were adopting again. Waiting for ANYTHING is always the hardest part!!! Especially when you set it up in your mind how it should go.

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  3. Ughhh. I hate waiting. Seriously, it's the down time in all of this that brings me such heartache and grief. Even when I'm failing, I feel better than when I'm waiting.

    The whole being presented to a birth mother and not getting chosen is another thing entirely. If I'm being super honest, it's one of the number one fears of mine about adoption. No one checks your photos, looks at your house, reviews your parenting strategies or judges you when you sign up for fertility treatments. And one of the little nagging thoughts that seems to come with infertility is "I won't be a good mom" which is obviously tested to the max when a birth mother is evaluating you to raise her child. I cannot fathom how stressful that is!

    Hoping you hear some good news soon!

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  4. Waiting with you friend!!!! Believing God has the perfect timing picked out already!

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