I need to get something off my chest that bothers me immensely. This constant quote and ones similar to it, on facebook (or elsewhere)- "God is so good to bless me with being a mother!"
I guess at first glance there's nothing wrong with this statement. And you may disagree, but I don't like the insinuation that lies beneath and this statement bothers me now even though I DO feel that God is good and am glad that God has blessed me with the opportunity to be a mother!
GOD IS STILL GOOD EVEN WHEN YOU ARE NOT A MOTHER (or father)!
I believe this to be true times a million! God is good no matter what. God is good even when the sky is falling, loved ones have died, you lost your job and you can't pay the bills. When you are lonely, tired, lost, scared and even depressed, God is STILL good. Why do I believe this? Because I read the Psalms. They are full of fear, loss yet God's ultimate goodness in the midst of trial. When we praise God for the blessings in our lives and fail to praise Him and call Him good in the midst of trial and suffering we are truly missing out. We are missing out on God's greatest gift of all- the gift of true contentment in His presence. It's so easy to praise God when things are good and wonderful and easy (like becoming a parent for most people), but please do not declare that God is good BECAUSE of those gifts. In my opinion, you're kind of missing the point.
I also believe in every.single.person's.worth. You are lovely, worthwhile, amazing, gifted and blessed. WHETHER OR NOT YOU ARE A MOTHER!!! People that have never experienced infertility (or any major life struggle) may be confused by why I am emphasizing this so much. But, let me tell you... comments like this can cut like a knife.
For so long I thought I was worthless because I couldn't become a mother. I felt like I had no direction, no purpose, no meaning to my life. Was any of this true? NO! And it took many, many tears and lots of crying out to God to get to the place of confidence and belief that I was a complete person without becoming a mother. Praise the Lord that I got to this place before the buddy came into our lives! Because I would surely be missing out if I thought my worth and life's greatest blessing came from being his mother.
Don't misunderstand me. Being the buddy's mother is amazing. He is amazing. I am SO blessed! But, even if I never became a mother, if YOU never become a mother, you are blessed! You are loved! YES! It feels like something is missing if you desperately long to be a parent and it's not happening month after month. Oh my goodness, it's the hardest. It's painful. It's lonely. It's rotten. It's horrible. Believe me, I know. But, I truly believe that God is still good and you are still worthwhile. You are an amazing, wonderful creation designed for so much MORE than motherhood! You were created for God's purposes. I don't know what those are specifically for you, but they're there! Don't miss out on discovering them!
Could I make a list of what I was made for? I don't know. But, we all must know deep down that we have worth. That we have a purpose and that God wants to be with us. He wants to fill us with HIM and HIS love deep down to our core. He wants to bless us, but all those other blessings (including parenthood) pale in comparison to knowing Him and pursuing Him and His purpose for you.
The truth is, if all you can about your purpose and worth is being a mother, you are missing out. Just like I was missing out when I thought I wouldn't have a purpose or meaning if I never BECAME a mom. So, GO! Go deeper! Listen to God and don't just thank Him for the good things. Praise Him for the tough stuff, because without it, you never really discover what truly matters.
The End. :-)